why can't the student central check with the DIAC themselves about changed visa extension policy? eff it

can't wait to rent out my own place, might need personal loan though.

study/life schedule is top priority now, can't get my head around it.

seems like i'm spending much more than i should be, given my financial goals.

Me gots an insatiable appetite (mhmm) and an even more bottomless stomach. Hee Mut be all the stress and allnighters. Got rejected too. Or brushed off, whichever. Not like it's the first time. Guess that teaches me to stray off. Getting pissed off regularly compared to a week ago. Then i was smiling all day like a crackpot and almost nothing could bring me down, not even the bitchhead coworker. Now i'm obviously disappointed, depressed and generally sad and feeling unworthy. Hell i'm so obvious that i'll try to cope with the disappointment with drinking after work. But no one's gonna drink to oblivion with me. Aishhh The more i recount the more i'm feeling down.

update

1) intern finished. quite profitable xp-wise. that's all i can say for now (shush to the ppl who know more xD)

2) still working all-nighters as a receptionist. it's getting so taxing on my sanity so i need to either find an exit point or make a decision. meeting the weirdest customers ever nightly.

3) having my last ever chance at UNSW. need to pass all this shit this year. need to buy txbks, go to lecs, tuts, revise, i'm so going to become a superwoman at the end of all this shit

4) just got my 4 weeks' notice to move out by 29/3. that's thursday? or was it 26/3? need to confirm. but finding another place is such a pain in the neck. i am really going to sign my own rental lease just so that I don't ever have to move again until i have no choice but to.

5) my memory is going. most probably because of the all nighters.

6) CoE, passport and visa renewals. eff this

7) health programs. hey romeo can you make me a juliet? (lame...

8) i want to break up. i have all the reasons to, but not enough resolve to.


so full, so sad, so tired

in teh last three weeks,

1) i started working nightly at an adult massage shop as a receptionist. they frking trained me for 5 days and i lost a week waiting for them to frking make up their minds about me. but i met and made some awesome acquaintances at the place, other than pushing my eyebags to the limit (maybe it's limitlessly big). i'm meeting all sorts of weird ppl through this job. like that weird taxi driver who gave me a free lift from city back home because i kept talking to him, let him hold my hand then gave him a one-handed shoulder massage all the way home. i know it's stupidly reckless.

2) i started a stint (and dropped it in a week) at a sushi takeaway shop in marketcity for 8/hr as a trainee.

3) then the internship position was offered, so i left that shitty stressful takeaway shop and took up the position calling and emailing and smsing ppl all day round. the office ppl are pretty awesome, i finally found someone amiable enough to share her lunch with me on our first day working together (sheesh). then i kinda developed a crush on the operations manager that i'm interning under. i supposed this is temporary.

the place i moved to is good, i got a pretty good sized room and bed to myself. the problem is about 80% of my stuff's in the garage and it's a pain to get them out. i wish someone else could do my laundry for me. sheesh

完全没力气了...

还得整理东西搬过去 但是时间一直不对

明天早上9点前要到CITY去开始试工一个星期, 然后去中介那里再提交申请, 然后如果被叫过去的话晚上9点到凌晨5点还要跑到PETERSHAM打工, 伤不起... 待会晚上也说不定要去PETERSHAM打到明天早上5点... 累死了

学校的问题还不算解决的, 前两个申请悲剧了,第三个学校就不用去考虑了, 反而第四个发了OFFER过来, 还得把所有COURSE OUTLINE给找出来发过去拿TRANSFER CREDIT...

累死了 一直紧张着 饿了也不想吃饭 房间里东西乱七八糟 什么都不想做 想去跳楼

家里一直打电话过来说 想把我拉回上海去 也行啊 都快无所谓了 丢脸就丢了呗

但是还是很想完全脱离父母 自己出来住
昨天还被人家指出来说我讲话一直会讲我妈说了什么, 这影响太大了

还要更新护照呢 嚓咧
目前有: 旧房租(344) 新房租(200) 手机费(35+20) 护照更新费(55) 签证帖子费(60) 签证更新费 体检费 车费 生活费 信用卡还钱(400) 学费(6120+) 保险费(1373+)
其实还想买个上网本呢 也就大概400左右吧

收入吗, 现在才这么多: 辅导(40/w) 熬夜的按摩店(560/w) 早上的CAFETERIA(<315</w)
后面两个还在试工, 其中按摩店试工三天星期四给工资还他妈一直搞混的拖着不给上班, CAFETERIA的反而试工一个星期每星期六才给工资.

其实还申请了很多intern但没有一个回复给我, 得去一个个的追问了吧...

如果这样继续生活下去的话 我会变成什么样子呢? 一天睡不了几个小时, 整天往外跑, 车票又不便宜 (NND今年又涨价了) 有时候还真的想去试试看那种夜店 (还会招像我这么肥的人吗=..=;) 或者去申请贷款 (谁会做担保啊嚓)

今年才22岁吗, 有必要这么苦吗...

let's say that i'm having it hard right now because i literally brought it on myself.
it's my fault that i didn't study properly, and my fault that i am transferring schools now.


... so is this enough reason to cut off all financial support?


maybe?

started this so-called training/induction period of 3 days at a massage shop in petersham. quite a pain to get there and back, and esp during and after the shift. freaking 9pm to 4-6am. you'd think that after all that nightoil-burning i should be able to cope with this like a flick of a nose boogie, but hell no, my left shoulder's almost gone after two nights. and there are no buses after the 4am closing. and i'm so irritated because the damn management's so indecisive that they are training yet another girl for the same position when they expressly advertised for one. and they still want me to train additional 3 days for a receptionist position, during which i get no pay but as a deposit refunded when i quit. so tonight i'm staying home, and possibly going back for actual work tmr night.

because i'm not sure how much i'll get paid, i've been calling and emailing around. there's a sales position at a cafeteria in city tmr and i'm supposed to be there by 11am. then a suitcase to pick up around noon in north bondi. then stuff to carry over to this garage space in randwick junction. then another interview in a massage shop in burwood/chatswood/rockdale after 1pm, depending on what the management there says. maybe i should push off the garage part to saturday.

hopefully some of the companies i sent resumes to will reply me by tomorrow.

and if i can weave this around somehow, i should move out to a cheaper place than the one with the garage my mum found at church.

i'm so tired i could scream. no money to pay rent. rantrantrant can i get a loan?

no more red bulls with beer. will stick to sports drinks from now on. stayed up the first day of the yearrrr

apartments in sydney

yes, they are either really good (=expensive), really crappy (=cheap), or just damn wrong inside out.


i wish the aus govmt had the initiative to buy up all the land around higher education institutes and in the inner west and east, evacuate, demolish, rebuild high rise apartments and privatise them or just create its own rental board to deal with the foreigners looking for cheap rentals. it might be chaotic every day for the govmt's rental department, but heck it's gna create so much more jobs for every one. every relatable business can profit from this shit, so why not just do it the way the chinese are doing it?

i hate aussie-designed buildings older than 10 years...

actually, i'm ranting because i am supposed to move out in about 12 days (well by 9am on the 13th Jan to be exact) and all this stuff in the room should be categorised and boxed and carted off to this nice korean family's garage and their main bedroom. did i mention the rent's 200/w with unlimited wifi? but there's going to be koreans in my face every day? (oh the horror of having to stutter out korean every day like a noob foreigner because i don't even look like one, if you get what i mean.) and the family's even more religious than my mother? (hardyharhar) and i don't even have the money for first week's rent? (maybe i shouldn't have splurged on that pair of red jeans on boxing day. but THEY FITTED ME, and i have the hardest time finding jeans that fit nowadays. excused enough) and i still don't have a job other than the irregular "tutoring"/essay guidance sessions? (cue parental grilling over the guerilla phone calls and skype meetings. it's not like i'm not sincerely looking for anything. i might be looking only for easy jobs, but seriously, cleaning all day around town? why don't you just tell me to go replace the statue-mime guy at circular quay? but still, cleaning's doable. just a bit more hurting on the pride, if i can still talk about keeping my pride up after all this academic shit.) what about the repayments on the credit card? (eff cba credit rules) what about the other bills? (why won't my own mother pay her part of the elec and wifi bills when she's been here fore more than two months. WHY am i supposed to pay all for her? even the rent!)

oh filial duties. i should just work my ass off cleaning ikea stores or something.


i have been sincerely regretting why i had not rented out my own apartment, and applied for a credit card. but my biggest regret will still be coming to sydney. it's been fun, and i still need to grow up.